Double Life Read online

  Everyone was gone except for Ash. His car was still in the driveway and Emma assumed that he’d been invited to stay the night, if not move in permanently. As she slipped through the French doors in the parlor, her heart quickened…but whether in excitement or apprehension, she wasn’t quite sure.

  Pamela had been right earlier. If anyone could determine the man’s true identity, it was Emma. She knew things about him that no one else did.

  In spite of all the precautions she and Ash had taken that summer, Pamela had seen them together in the gazebo and Helen had guessed at her true feelings. But no one really knew what had gone on between Emma and Ash. No one could know the depth of their emotions or the secrets they’d shared…unless Ash had told them himself. And he would never have done that. Not the Ash Emma had known.

  But that Ash was gone, she reminded herself yet again. The man she’d loved so desperately that summer was never coming back.

  The moon was up, but once she left the garden, the grounds lay in deep shadow. Something rustled in the oleander bushes and she whirled in fear.

  It was nothing. Just one of Helen’s three-toed cats roaming the gardens. She kept half a dozen or so on the property, and Emma could see the amber gleam of the feline’s eyes as he stalked his prey.

  She watched for a moment, then continued down the path. Maybe she shouldn’t be out so late, she thought nervously. She might be pressing her luck. Striving to overcome one’s unreasonable fears was one thing, but it was quite another to deliberately tempt fate.

  But the Corbett estate was ensconced behind stone walls and fences. She was safe here. She would never have come back if she thought otherwise.

  The summerhouse was tucked away in a man-made grotto, landscaped with ferns and bromeliads and shielded from the upstairs window of the main house by banana trees and palms. A stream cut through the grounds and Emma could hear the sound of water trickling over well-placed rocks.

  In this cool, lush fairyland, it was hard to imagine that the beach was so nearby, but the salty breeze that blew in from the gulf was a constant reminder.

  One of Helen’s cats had bedded down for the night in the airy pavilion, and when he saw Emma, his ears went back in alarm and he shot past her so quickly that she had to jump out of the way.

  Then she stepped inside the rounded structure and stood in the center for a moment as memories closed in on her.

  She hadn’t been to the summerhouse since she’d come to work for Helen. Emma tried to fool herself into believing that she’d been too busy, but she had plenty of time for her walks and for reading in the garden. She could have made the short trek to the grotto if she’d really wanted to, but the truth of the matter was…she was afraid of this place. Afraid of the ghosts and memories. Afraid that she would never again find the kind of happiness she’d known here in Ash’s arms.

  And now he was back and the pull to the summerhouse had been irresistible tonight.

  Emma stood for the longest time gazing through the arched openings into the darkness, her arms hugging her chest as she let the memories wash over her.

  “I don’t want to leave you tonight,” Ash said to her. “I wish we could stay like this until morning.”

  Emma had propped herself on her elbow and smiled down at him. “We can’t, though. My father would come looking for me, and if your grandmother ever found out about us—”

  “I don’t care if she finds out. She can’t make me stop seeing you.”

  “She could cut you out of her will. You’d lose everything.”

  “No, I wouldn’t. I’d still have you.”

  He curled his fingers around her neck and pulled her to him. Emma lay her head on his shoulder, splaying her hand over his bare chest so that she could feel the steady beat of his heart. It quickened as her fingers trailed down his stomach.

  He caught her hand and drew it to his lips. “I love you, Emma.”

  “I love you, too,” she’d said. “More than you’ll ever know.”

  The sound of a snapping twig startled her out of her daydream, and Emma’s heart pounded in alarm.

  And then she saw him. He moved out of the shadows and for a moment he stood silhouetted in the doorway of the gazebo.

  Slowly, he stepped inside. She couldn’t see his face clearly, but she knew that he was staring at her. She felt the heat of his gaze pierce the walls she’d built around her heart and it frightened her. Excited her. She hardly dared breathe for fear he might disappear again.

  He moved toward her and she closed her eyes.

  “You remembered,” she whispered.

  THE BREATHY QUALITY OF HER VOICE was like a sensuous caress. He tried not to react to it because he didn’t want to give her the wrong idea.

  So instead he glanced around with a careless shrug. “Sure I remember this place.”

  His matter-of-fact tone caused her to falter. It was very dark inside the structure, but he had no trouble imagining the doubt flickering in her gray eyes. “Why are you here?”

  “In the gazebo? I might ask you the same thing.” He took another step toward her and she folded her arms as if putting a barrier between them.

  I couldn’t sleep,” she said. “I felt like taking a walk.”

  “Another walk, huh?” He wished he could see her more clearly. He had to be very careful not to say or do the wrong thing, but it was hard to read her in the dark.

  Maybe he’d made a mistake following her down here, but when he’d seen her slipping through the garden, he’d acted on impulse.

  “I felt like taking a walk, too,” he said.

  She turned to him, her eyes glittering. “But why here?”

  “Why not here?”

  “You know why….”

  Her voice trailed off on a note of suspicion, and he chided himself for forcing another meeting so soon. But if his own suspicions were right, the longer he waited the more dangerous she could become.

  “I came because I thought you might be here and I wanted to talk to you. We barely had a chance to speak on the road earlier. I think we need to clear the air about a few things.”

  He sensed rather than saw her scowl. “Clear the air…about what?”

  “About what happened twelve years ago.” He hated what he was about to do her, but it couldn’t be helped. He had to remove her as a threat once and for all. It would be better for her in the long run, too.

  Or had he read her wrong earlier on the road? Maybe she didn’t still carry a torch for Ash Corbett, but he had to find out for sure. “I hurt you when I left and I’m sorry for that.”

  “It was a long time ago. It hardly matters now.” But in spite of her denial, her voice trembled with emotion.

  So his instincts were right. She’d been in love with Ash Corbett twelve years ago and she was still vulnerable to him today. She could still be hurt by him and that was the last thing he wanted.

  “So you’re over me,” he said.

  She gave a soft laugh. “Your ego astounds me. Of course I’m over you. We were kids, for God’s sake.”

  “Then why have you never married?”

  He heard her breath catch again. And then her voice hardened. “Why haven’t you?” she shot back. “Or…did you?”

  “No, I’m not married. But we were talking about you.”

  She shrugged. “I suppose I haven’t met the right man, but I’m hardly over the hill, you know.”

  He smiled. “So I noticed.”

  He felt a pang of regret as she reacted to his words. Moonlight flashed in her eyes as she looked up at him. “I can’t believe you’re really here.”

  “I know. I’m finding it a little hard to believe myself.”

  “Why did you really come back, Ash? Why now, after all these years?”

  He hesitated, choosing his words carefully. “Probably for the same reason you did. I have roots here. And maybe I found out the hard way that when the chips are down, family is all that matters. Isn’t that why you accepted my uncle’s job offer? To be n
ear your father?”

  “How did you know that Wesley got me the job?”

  “David Tobias told me. He filled me in on a lot of things that happened since I left. I’m sorry about your father. He’s okay now, though, right?”

  “Yes. He’s doing a lot better, thank you.”

  “You two were always close. You must have been pretty scared when he got sick.”

  “I was. I don’t know what I’d do if I lost him. He’s all I have,” she said softly.

  “So you understand what I’m saying.”

  “Oh, I understand about family,” she said. “But you were never that close to yours.”

  “I was a kid. I took a lot of things for granted. I’m not the same person I was back then.”

  “I can see that.”

  They both fell silent, and as his gaze drifted over her silhouette, he wondered what it had been like for her, loving a man who had apparently walked away without a backward glance. Had that betrayal made her reluctant to put her heart on the line again? Was that why she was still single?

  He could tell she was guarded in the way she held herself, and for a moment, he was tempted to see if he could tear down those defenses.

  Desire tugged at his resolve as he watched her in the dark, but he wouldn’t give into it. No matter how attractive he found her, he couldn’t afford to get close to her, and he couldn’t allow her to wear her emotions on her sleeve. It was too dangerous…for both of them.

  This had to end tonight but he couldn’t be too heavy-handed. That might tip her off.

  He could feel her gaze on him and he realized that he’d been silent for too long. He started to say something but she beat him to it.

  “So how was it? Seeing your family again, I mean. Was it what you expected?”

  He gave the matter some thought. “Yes and no. I suppose a part of me wanted to be welcomed back with open arms regardless of how much time has passed.”

  “You didn’t really expect that, though. Not after letting everyone believe you were dead for twelve years. You’re lucky your grandmother even let you in the house. You know how stubborn she can be.”

  The bitterness in her voice was like a slap across the face. He raked his fingers through his hair as he moved to the doorway of the gazebo and stared out at the darkness. Then he turned back to Emma.

  “When I left here I never had any intention of returning. I thought it was best to make a clean break…from everyone. But like I said, things changed. Feelings changed. What appeared to be an impossible situation with my grandmother twelve years ago now seems like what it was…a spoiled kid throwing a temper tantrum because he didn’t want to grow up and face his responsibilities.”

  “That doesn’t sound like the Ash I knew talking,” she murmured. “That sounds like Helen.”

  His voice hardened. “If you’d ever been down to your last nickel with no prospects in sight you might not be so quick to judge me.”

  “I’m not judging you,” she rushed to assure him. “But back then you never cared about the money—”

  “Because it was always there,” he said with his own bitterness. “I’ve tried it the other way now and believe me, being your own man isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.”

  Her disappointment was tangible.

  “So you didn’t come back because you missed your family,” she said slowly. “You came back for the money.”

  “It’s the same thing. I see that now. I was born a Corbett. Running away didn’t change who I am. It finally made me willing to accept it. Maybe even embrace it.”

  “Along with all that entails? The responsibilities? The expectations?” She shook her head, as if she still couldn’t believe what he was saying. “You once told me that you would never accept the life your grandmother chose for you.”

  “And I didn’t. I tried things my way. The choice to come back was mine and mine alone.”

  “I see.” He heard the defeat in her voice, and it gave him no pleasure to burst her illusions. He didn’t want to hurt her, but letting her live in a fantasy world would be a far greater unkindness. The man she’d loved was probably gone forever. Maybe he could help her finally move on.

  “Everyone said you’d changed, but I didn’t quite believe it until now. When I saw you earlier…” She trailed off and looked away. “Twelve years is a long time, I guess. Longer than I realized.”

  He nodded. “You’ve changed, too, you know.”

  She touched her short hair. “So I’ve been told.”

  “I’m not just talking about your hair. You’ve lost the light in your eyes. Where did that go, Emma?”

  “It doesn’t matter.”

  “Of course, it matters. Just because we’ve both changed doesn’t mean I don’t care about you. I hope we can still be friends.”

  “Friends,” she repeated numbly.

  He resisted the urge to touch her chin, to lift her face to his. “We were best friends once, remember? And I have a feeling I’m going to need all the allies I can get in my corner.”

  It was a very long time before she spoke. “You let me believe you were dead for all those years and now you come waltzing back into my life and expect me to be your friend?” Her voice broke with anger. “You’ve got some nerve.”

  She tried to move past him, but he caught her arm. “Let’s get one thing straight.” He paused before shoving the final dagger into her heart. “I didn’t come waltzing back into your life. This is my life. My home. My family. I belong here whether you like it or not.”

  EMMA DIDN’T LOOK BACK AS SHE hurried away from the gazebo. From Ash.

  She had no idea if he was somewhere behind her on the path or if he’d at least had the decency to allow her a moment to compose herself.

  But it would take more than a moment for her to come to terms with what had just happened. In a single conversation, Ash had destroyed her dreams and diminished what they once had. And even worse, he’d made her ashamed for still caring about him.

  How could she have been so stupid as to harbor, even for a second, the hope that he would still feel the same about her?

  He’d been gone for so long and a lot had happened to Emma in his absence. It was true that she wasn’t the same person, either, but a part of her heart had been trapped in that summerhouse all these years.

  A part of her had been waiting for Ash to come back so that they could pick back up where they left off. In her dreams, he’d never stopped loving her. He’d had a good reason for leaving, for disappearing without a word, but none of that would matter when they saw each other again.

  Now, in the wake of their conversation, Emma saw things clearly for the first time in years. She’d clung tightly to that childhood fantasy because it was a defense, another wall she’d erected around her heart.

  The torch she’d carried for Ash had given her an excuse to shy away from other men, to cut herself off from the possibility of an adult relationship.

  She was scared to take a risk and so she’d convinced herself that Ash was the love of her life when in reality theirs had been nothing more than a summer fling, one that he’d probably forgotten the moment he left town.

  And now he wanted to be her friend. A classic way of letting her down easy.

  Emma’s first impulse was to go straight to her room, pack her bags, and get as far away from Jacob’s Pass as she possibly could. She was hurt and humiliated and she dreaded the prospect of seeing Ash again, especially on a regular basis.

  But running away never solved anything. Ash was proof of that, she supposed.

  Maybe seeing him every day was the perfect way to get over him.

  Because the man she’d confronted in the summer-house was someone Emma didn’t even much like.

  THE DEED WAS DONE.

  He sat smoking in the dark as he thought back over their conversation. Had he said anything to give himself away?

  He’d been careful and pretty darn clever, if he did say so himself. All he’d had to do was let her take the
lead and she’d revealed herself so easily.

  A little too easily, he thought with a frown.

  It was obvious that she’d never gotten over her first love, and he hadn’t liked hurting her feelings. But he’d done it because it was necessary. He’d had no choice. He couldn’t let her harbor the notion that there could still be something between them because if she got too close—God forbid if he ever kissed her—she would know the truth about him.

  His cell phone rang, and he fished it out of his pocket to check the caller ID. When he saw that it was David Tobias, he wasn’t going to answer, but then changed his mind and lifted the phone to his ear.

  “Where the hell are you?” the lawyer thundered.

  “You don’t sound happy.”

  “I’m not in the mood for games,” Tobias warned. “Just tell me where you are.”

  “I’m at the house.”

  “You’re lying. I’m at the cabin right now. Your car and clothes are gone. We had an agreement, you son of a bitch. If I have to track you down—”

  “Relax.” He flicked the cigarette through the gazebo doorway. “I didn’t run out on you. I’m at the estate.”

  “The Corbett estate?”

  “That’s the only one I know,” he said.

  A long pause. Then Tobias said in a deadly calm voice, “What have you done?”

  The menace in the lawyer’s tone was unmistakable and he knew better than to take it lightly. David Tobias would be a very dangerous man to have as an enemy, and he had to be very careful about what he said and did.

  “I’ve only done what you told me to do. You wanted Helen Corbett to accept me as her grandson. She’s done that.”

  “You’ve seen Helen?”

  “I left her a few minutes ago. We had a very poignant reunion, and now she believes I’m her grandson.”

  “Helen Corbett is nobody’s fool,” the attorney said suspiciously. “What did you say to her?”

  “I let her do most of the talking. Then I gave her the story that we rehearsed and it worked like a charm.”

  “I don’t believe you. You’re up to something.” Another tense pause. “Let me make something very clear to you. I’m a very powerful man in these parts. If you’ve double-crossed me, I will bury you. The raw deal you received in Louisiana will seem like nothing compared to the kind of justice you’ll find down here. Do you understand what I’m saying?”